“Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there be any hurtful way in me, And lead me in an everlasting way.”

— Psalm 139:23-24

King David was a deeply flawed man. He went against God’s instructions and authorized a census that led to a deadly plague. He lusted after Bathsheba, another man’s wife. And he arranged to have Bathsheba’s husband killed so he could have her. Yet God called David “a man after his own heart.”

Why?

Because David knew a secret, he knew that God desired mercy over sacrifice. He knew that God was good with mercy that endured forever. He knew the true character of God which caused him to relate to God based on his true nature rather than through his own sinful nature.

David knew that he was sinful before God, but he knew that God would have mercy on him. This created freedom within David before the Lord. David was able to bear his heart to God and ask for things that seemed to be illegal under the Law at the time. David should have been rebuked and killed for what he did, but he had a heart connection with God that transcended judgment.

This understanding within David led him to pray great and wonderful things. He asked God to create within him a clean heart. It’s as if David knew God’s intentions to give us a new heart through the work of the Messiah.

David knew a secret. He knew that God was good and merciful. This allowed him to be open and honest with God, without fear and with the expectation that God would cleanse him and forgive him.

We can learn this lesson from David. We have peace with God. Our relationship is whole with God. He has exhausted his anger toward our sin in the atoning work of Jesus. We are now free before the Lord. Free to be open and honest for the purpose of experiencing his transformative power.

If we are afraid of God, we will not go to him for help. But if we know he loves us and will help us without judgment, we will open our hearts to him, be honest and allow him to go into the dark places in our hearts to help us.

Be Honest

You must be honest with God and yourself if you want to consistently hear and follow God. God speaks the language of truth. His leading will always be rooted in truth. If there is any self-deception in your heart, you will miss God and blame Him for the troubles you brought on yourself. If you're not honest with yourself, you will not be submissive to God's truth when it arises in your heart.

You'll hold on to justifications and excuses. You’ll hold on to pride and fear. You’ll continue in sin and minimize its effects in your life. You carry bad attitudes and judgments toward people when you’re not honest with yourself. But you can walk away from those issues and experience God in your inner man.

It is possible to allow God to search your heart and reveal areas where you are hindering his grace in your life. The areas you hide from God and lie to yourself about are the areas where you have the most pain. The areas where you’re willing to remain deceived are the areas in which you’re still struggling.

But you can be free. You can bear your heart to God and allow him to do a deep work of healing within you. As he heals you and supplies grace to transform, step into the power that arises and make the changes. Each step you take becomes easier. As you confess your sins and admit your failures, you open yourself to God’s power in your areas of weakness.

He already knows. You’re not hiding anything from God. You just don’t know how to trust him in those areas. King David’s lessons can help you. He’s been through it. Read through the following Psalm and bear your heart to God. Read from the perspective of a beloved, righteous child of God, but be honest with yourself in the areas you know need to experience change.

Psalm 51 NASB

A Contrite Sinner’s Prayer for Pardon.

For the music director. A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet came to him, after he had gone into Bathsheba.

1 Be gracious to me, God, according to Your faithfulness; According to the greatness of Your compassion, wipe out my wrongdoings.
2 Wash me thoroughly from my guilt and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my wrongdoings, and my sin is constantly before me.
4 Against You, You only, I have sinned and done what is evil in Your sight, so that You are justified when You speak and blameless when You judge.
5 Behold, I was brought forth in guilt, and in sin my mother conceived me.
6 Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, and in secret You will make wisdom known to me.
7 Purify me with hyssop, and I will be clean; Cleanse me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness, let the bones You have broken rejoice.
9 Hide Your face from my sins and wipe out all my guilty deeds.
10 Create in me a clean heart, God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me away from Your presence, and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of Your salvation, and sustain me with a willing spirit.
13 Then I will teach wrongdoers Your ways, and sinners will be converted to You.
14 Save me from the guilt of bloodshed, God, the God of my salvation; then my tongue will joyfully sing of Your righteousness.
15 Lord, [k]open my lips, so that my mouth may declare Your praise.
16 For You do not delight in sacrifice, otherwise I would give it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offering.
17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and a contrite heart, God, You will not despise.
18 By Your favor do good to Zion; build the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then You will delight in [m]righteous sacrifices, in burnt offering and whole burnt offering; then bulls will be offered on Your altar.